Friday, 31 December 2010

Happy New Year!

It is the last day of the year and I would like to wish you all a happy and joyful New Year.

I hope I too will have a good new year. The old one has not been so good. It started – after a wonderful Christmas and New Year's Eve and what seemed like a bright future – with deceat, breaking up and breaking down. A breakdown I still ain't done with. Everything has changed and nothing will ever be the same again.

A breakdown may be a new beginning. An opportunity to build oneself up again. Each individual have the responsibility to pull oneself out of the darkness. Making a decision of ending the selfpity and stop wasting time. Dry ones eyes and stop being a victim.

There is a time for everything though. A time to grieve. A time to be bitter. A time to potter around in the darkness. A time to move upward again. Timing is everything. Being ready. Maybe one should from time to time check whether one is now ready to make the change that one needs and then act, if ready. Otherwise one might not get up. If one is not ready, it is no use.

It has been a year when the consequenses of having Lymphedema fully dawned on me. It has been a spring with six weeks of continuous bandaging with fatal consequences. A summer of shame and grief over my ugly leg in my fleshcolored supportstocking. A year of hybernating.

Some good things happended too though. I started this blog, and although I haven't got tons of readers I don't regret starting it, and perhaps over time more readers will come and share knowledge. Must give it time. I am grateful for the comments and emails I have recieved, and for my followers. Thank you.

It has also been positive to get away from the hospital and their "treatment" and it has been a joy to find my amazing, competent and caring physical therapist who takes such good care of me. I am so grateful. I often think of the innocent people who still frequents the hospital where I used to go. I wish that they too had escaped and gotten/taken the opportunity of professional and competent treatment with manual drainage, proper bandaging and measurements, etc.

My recent trip to Asia was also a good thing, and it did me good. Also my good friend's visit and our trip to Stockholm I cherish.

Despite all my moaning I am grateful for what I have. My loving parents. My home. Food in my belly, a bed to sleep in, healthinsurance. My travels. My Qi Gong teacher. My good friend. My little nieces and nephew. My new coffeemaker.

For the first time ever I am spending New Years Eve alone. Feels a bit surreal, but I think it is going to be fine.

I wish you all a happy New Year, filled with joy, love and good times.

4 comments:

  1. Hello blogger friend. I am glad you started your lymphedema blog. I was just diagnosed with lymphedema in both legs in NOV. 2009, but I had been dealing with it long before that. I am glad that at least I am learning what to do to manage it. It truly gets depressing some days, and I know what you mean about the compression hose in the summer.(Mine are 20/30, so they start hurting,I'm sweating, and I just want to cry!
    Have a good year. Come visit my blog sometime. I have some pictures of my legs.

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  2. Dear Friend
    Wishing you a good 2011 from England. My mum got lymphedoema out of the blue last January in her left arm (she had cancer in the left breast over 15 years ago)and we are at our wits' end trying to find something to help her. I am a professional massage therapist but massaging her arm just causes more pain.
    I have been training in healing for almost 20 years, I teach tai chi, yogo, qigong but again I feel powerless to help mum. I just hug her and rub her lower back when she's really down and in lots of pain.
    Wishing you all the best
    Monica.

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  3. Hi Jackie, it is good to hear you know to handle it, I am learning myself, and it is going better than it was. What a relief to be able to do something.
    Great blog you have, I have registered as a follower :-)
    A happy new year to you too!

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  4. Dear Monica.
    I was very sad to hear about your mums lymphoedema and the despair you are in to try and help her. It is unbearable to see a loved one hurting.
    I was very suprised to read that it could start as much as 15 years after cancer surgery! Is your mum recieving any treatment at all, and does she wear a compression sleeve?
    Have you tried doing Manual Lymphatic Drainage (MLD) on your mums arm? It is a very gentle form of massage, aiming to push the built up fluid upwards, away from the hand or foot. You can try and do soft strokes, like caressing, perhaps a tiny bit firmer, over and over again. As if you were putting on a glove on the arm, pulling it upwards. Alwas only one-way, never downwards. Gentle strokes. Before you start, it is a good idea to open up the lymphglands at the neck and in the armpits.
    You can check out the link "video about self-MLD" in the right column of this blog to learn about MLD, and there are also videos on Youtube where therapists do it on patients. Also, as you live in England you can easily get you hands on the DVD I link to.
    Keeping the arm elevated when possible might provide a little relief.
    I am sorry if you knew all this already. I don't have pain from my lymphoedema as such. I go to a lymphoedema therapist (physiotherapist specialising in lymphoedema) every now and then, she gives me MLD and sometimes wrappes my leg, which I have also learnt to do myself. Not very good at it though. I wear a custommade compression stocking from I wake up till I go to bed, it keeps things at bay.
    You can also check out discussion boards such as lymphedemapeople.com and lymphnotes.com
    Please let me know if this was any good.

    Warm regards, and a good new year to you and your family.

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